Home Awesome Meet Kalan, He’s Literally The Worst Street Performer In The Whole World

Meet Kalan, He’s Literally The Worst Street Performer In The Whole World

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“I describe what i do as a non-narrative, nihilist, anarchist puppet show about literary theory.”

1. Thankfully for the rest of us, Gothamist has found the world’s worst street performer. His name is Kalan and unsurprisingly he performs in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

Video available at: http://youtube.com/watch?v=3LNfJh9lGUU. youtube.com

2. Kalan wears a lot of actual garbage. Also, warpaint.

youtube.com

youtube.com

 

3. And he travels around with a bunch of other actual garbage.

And he travels around with a bunch of other actual garbage.

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youtube.com

4. He also drinks out of the garbage.

youtube.com

youtube.com

 

5. Sometimes he runs around subway trains dressed kind of like a Jawa from Star Wars.

Sometimes he runs around subway trains dressed kind of like a Jawa from Star Wars .

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youtube.com

6. And sometimes he stands on trash cans and waves around a big tube.

And sometimes he stands on trash cans and waves around a big tube.

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youtube.com

7. He describes what he does as “a non-narrative, nihilist, anarchist puppet show about literary theory.”

He describes what he does as "a non-narrative, nihilist, anarchist puppet show about literary theory."

View this image ›

youtube.com

8. Pictured below: something apparently about literary theory.

Pictured below: something apparently about literary theory.

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youtube.com

9. Oh, and sometimes he’ll touch you with his garbage puppets.

Oh, and sometimes he'll touch you with his garbage puppets.

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youtube.com

10. He’s using a baby doll attached to his fingers to caress this man’s leg.

He's using a baby doll attached to his fingers to caress this man's leg.

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youtube.com

11. Now he’s using the same baby doll to touch the man’s shoulder while blowing a harmonica in his face.

Now he's using the same baby doll to touch the man's shoulder while blowing a harmonica in his face.

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youtube.com

12. So, now you know, this is Kalan.

So, now you know, this is Kalan.

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youtube.com

13. And he’s the worst.

And he's the worst.

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youtube.com

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/ryanhatesthis/meet-kalan-hes-literally-the-worst-street-performer-in-the-w